This New Era

I enter this new era. I am wondering how I got to be here exactly. I realize of course with some discerning part of myself that I am here because God put me here. I realized that that is true with every bounded existence, every existence whether or not the boundaries are recognized or present. 

According to acts 17 God sets the boundaries. He orchestrates the events. He does this For All mankind not just for me. However, his primary purpose is so that man will look around, seek God, and then as God reveals himself to the man the relationship with God begins in earnest. 

Begins. 

The boundaries of this era seem to include ordered rest but not achieved rest. I can see that a man may die from this. I'm driving on an expressway and the Lord is telling me it's time to exit, I'm guess doing so through an eminently qualified doctor. However, I am not exiting. 

This analogy seems strangely familiar to me because it is the first sermon I ever preached. At that time, the exits were salvation. Salvation was dismissed and Satan was in the car and he was comforting the driver, encouraging the driver to continue without taking one of the exits. I'd had a reason to believe then the failure to take an exit to salvation would result in the death of one and even the eternal separation. 

But this era is not about spiritual death and separation from God as much as it may be about simply keeping a heart beating and brain waving. He says I must rest. He says I must decompress. But I'm awake at 6:00 a.m. . I am in the Bible and seeking God through prayer. I am not back to sleep. Then, today at least, I am writiing this.

My body says the Sun is up why shouldn't I be even as much fatigue says, he really should be listening to the doctor. Somewhere in the rattly chambers of my mind, a notion finds a tiny bit of nurture. Could this be my exit? If I spend myself on God and leave this world now will He not take me into his presence? Yes, of course He would. 

 The current concern in  the voices of those who say they love me is touching. I have seldom felt in all my life touched in such a way. I do find such concern strangely absent in certain places I have looked for that kind of resonance in the past. 

Of all the world perhaps my wife trusts me the most. Another notion concerning whether I am betraying that trust by contemplating my own  demise arises within me. I comfort myself by telling myself that I did not choose this era. But in the very same instant I consider that arrogantly summing up my choices, which did indeed lead to this era, as God ordained, indicates the kind of hubris that even worshipers of a false god should conclude leads to self-destruction. 

So, I know better. A unique situation. A situation I believe calls for a unique response. Thoughts of uniqueness couched in an understanding that there is actually nothing new under the Sun. But not everybody recognizes the era, perhaps I do not recognize the era, and even though I am discussing the era perhaps I am unequipped (I carefully use this word with all the defference to God and know meaning of insult.) I do know better. Whatever course I'm slated to take God has equipped me for it. 

I am not awake praying and writing this now because I'm a fool. But, I am wise because he has made me wise. I find however within myself the inability to direct myself to deal judiciously with this new era. I recognize that weakness. I say I am seeking wisdom and biblical counsel. I received some input. Soon I must begin to assess and apply. 

I trust God. That will do it. That will be my sufficient response. I trust God with my continued drive. I trust him with my exit. I know enough to hope for myself the will the Lord, to pray for the will of the Lord, and as He makes it, to live it....or to die it.

Thank you Lord Jesus for the life I have lived for the promise of the life yet to come in this world and the next. Despite challenging thoughts of morbidity which can be little more than spiritual warfare, please continue to give me victory, daily, even at 6:00 a.m. when I didn't go to bed until midnight and woke up four times, even when I'm tired and it seems like my legs aren't quite working, even with blood counts that bespeak serious illness, and even with a doctor's orders. 

Lord, this era is yours. I find within myself the same weaknesses I have seen in my ability to deal with past eras. So, you're up. You the one. In this ongoing grudge match between us and your eternal enemies, I tag you in once again. I know I probably haven't done that enough and that is probably the real reason why I am here. I repent today. 

As I stand here, or rather lay, I do make this very intentional choice to let you fight this battle, and knowing some thing about your amazing power, I declare the win. I declare the win not because I trust I will get it right, but because I realize that every outcome is a win if you are the one doing the fighting. But I realize it goes beyond that because I am not even able to see the goal. 

Been there before. 

Been here before? 

Please steer.

Please plot the course.

Your car not mine. 

Your fuel not mine.

Like every other era of my life, I realize that the victory is in settling into you, in my God provided armor, as enemies Fall Away, shattering against your sword of the spirit, recklessly throwing themselves in their contrived plots against the shield of faith, failing to penetrate your protection provided by the helm of salvation and the breast plate of righteousness, I have seldom felt more girded up by the belt of Truth and I'm more empowered and called by these shoes. 

I suppose in order for the Gates of hell to not prevail against us they must come against us. That's going to look like this sometimes. These times. The gates must Fall and for them to fall, God being sovereign, will spend whatever resources He chooses if  spending is the thing that a God like our God must do. I am not certain it is. 

If it is, I am willing. But given His immeasurable resources He seems the one to decide such as well. Sovereignty is a concept ordinarily beyond human understanding. I believe now that there is a new nuance to this understanding that I am retrieving during my expedition into this era.

So be it. All Glory to king Jesus. 

P. Daniel Stevenson
Pastor New Heights Fellowship
Director Southside Life Station
419.469.0270
churchToledo.com
app: life4toledo
text INFO to 419.419.0095 for updates
text NHFBCT to 49775 to get free right now media